Sunday, August 28, 2011

Farewell message

I have wished to be ordained as a forest Buddhist monk for several years. My wife support my decision. However, I had been hesitating. By 2009, my holding of the 5 precepts was alreday perfect. (I no longer kill ants, not taking things which are not mine, including unattended snacks left in the office kitchen, not telling a lie, no profanity, no night-life entertainment with ladies, no alcohol.) By early 2010, I could meditate deeply to the fourth level Jhana. The mind was much developed, both Samatha and Vipassana. The mind was getting closer to be that of a monk.

Last year, "my" feeling was that I did not need to be a monk, just to be one internally (mentally) would be sufficient. I have made much progress, to a safe level. I have experienced the utmost serenity, freedom, wisdom in Nirvana. I have no doubt on the eternal existence of Nivana.

Then I started to feel bored with internal Kilases, the taints in the mind. As a layperson living in a city, one would need to face various stresses and experience mental stimuli, which I want to avoid. I saw that getting into a forest is inevitable if I want to develope the mind further.

I have consulted some monks and I then saw logical reasons why I should come this way. After making final decision, I feel quite satisfied. Sometimes I felt eager, like a young soldier about to enter a war, but this is going to be my internal war with various internal desires. I want to put out those burning flames. Sometimes I felt worry about my family a bit. However, I felt my life was running out of time.

In a few days, I 'd become a forest monk. I would not have time to update this blog again, unless I come out from the forest later, and live somewhere with electricity and network access.

However, I do not think that I 'd be able to continue writing on this blog, unless I come out of monkhood and become a layperson again. Regulations of Buddhst monks (Vinaya) laid down by Lord Buddha forbid monks from discussing their personal experience with non-monk laypersons, to prevent solicitation of foods or wealth. Although my intention for blogging is to provide insight information to those who seek the know-how, continue doing so later would be risky and my judgement tells me it is improper. So if I would ever blog again, it will be in a less-personal format and in another blog.

In the near future, there will be drastic changes on this earth, so called Tiamat: people, animals, and plants will all be affected. Anything that has a start also has an end. I intend to not worry about anything. Any remaining stuff, including unfinished jobs, will be left as is. I aim that once a life ends, everying tying to it in this dimension should end as well. Not to worry about them anymore.

I hope this blog is informative to international community. Whoever wish to develop his or her mind, regardless of their faith and religion, can practice this way. However, you need perseverance. Imagine yourself an athlete training for a future international competition, you need to train the body and the mind for years, perhaps a decade. This is the same kind of training. I wish you the best in your mental development and I hope you reach your eternal happiness and can start accessing to Nirvana as soon as possible. May Dhamma be with you.

I thus end my blog posting for now.